There was a little girl...

who had a little curl right in the middle of her forehead. And when she was good, she was very, very good, but when she was bad she was HORRID!!!!!!!!!

Rock 'n Roll Mamas (and Kids)

I like this picture - taken before we all went to see Green Day here in Chula Vista on October 2nd. From left to right: My daughter's best friend, Kristen, my daughter, Anjoli, my friend Anna (in her Clash shirt), me in my Anti-Bush shirt,
Colin (Kristen's brother).

For those who care, my t-shirt says:"Moral Values? War, Greed, Corruption, Dishonesty, Intolerance, Fear Mongering"

Martha Martha Martha!

Ok, the very sweet Vanessa e-mailed the picture she took of the Divine Miss Martha Wainwright and I at the Casbah in San Diego last week. I look, ah, a bit crisp. I made sure not to wear lipstick, because in the last photo I took with her, I had lipstick on one of my teeth! Why can't I be a girly girl who remembers to keep tabs on these things?

Now and Zen You See Your Soul

Sometimes in life, God smiles down on us and leads us to what I call a "soulfriend."
Not a soulmate - that usually implies a life partner. Have you ever met someone and just instantly bonded with them? It's happened to me maybe several times in my life.
Last weekend, our dear family friend Simon introduced me to an amazing woman named Sattya, who,like himself, is a devotee of the "Hugging Saint" from India, known affectionately as "Amma." (The Guru's real name is Mata Amritanandamayi).
Sattya used to be a fashion designer - she had a wholesale clothing business and shop on 5th Avenue in New York. That life was too stressful - so she became a Fortune 500 corporate recruiter. She placed 27 clients in the World Trade Center - she was able to save seven of them on 9/11 - she called them on her cell phone and begged them to run out of the building - no questions allowed. The guilt she felt was unbearable "I put them in that building," she told me. She worked around the clock for the Red Cross at Ground Zero for five months - making meals and serving the rescue workers, counseling families of the victims as they went through the agony of having to identify their loved ones, lending moral support and hugs to the workers, helping them when they needed it most and wanted to quit (can you blame them?). One day a worker complained about the food. "What is this slop? I want some meat!" So Sattya said, "ok!" She went and bought him a huge steak, whipped up some mashed potatoes and brought it over to him. He wept. I can't imagine the hell those workers went through.
Sattya gave up everything about a year ago - sold her BMW, gave up the Manhattan apartment, gave away all her furniture. She moved back to Bombay where she is an advocate for cancer patients and their families. You wouldn't believe the stories she has to tell. She was caught in the Bombay floods over the summer -walking around in water up to her neck, rescuing people - dead bodies floating all around her.
She has been a follower of Amma's for over 10 years. She used to go back and forth between NY and India - helping the poor and downtrodden per Amma's requests.
Amma feels very strongly about the children who live in the Red Light district of Calcutta. So, one day Sattya and another devotee who is a NY based photographer went to the Red Light district, with the intention of rescuing some children. This is probably one of the most dangerous places in the world for women to wander into. Sattya is very fair for an Indian, and she can speak Bengali - so she was really the navigator. Her friend (who is American)began taking pictures - and the pimps were MAD AS HELL. "What? Are you a journalist? Get out of here with your camera!" So her friend turned it around, and let the children take pictures of eachother. The children loved it so much that Sattya and her friend came back with disposable cameras for them to use.
Sattya and her friend were able to rescue 50 children - they wanted to place them in a boarding school - but many were HIV positive, and therefore were not accepted. So they placed them in a (British) orphanage. Sadly, most of the parents came and took them back to the slums, saying they needed them to work, clean, etc. Only 10 of the original 50 remained. She told me that many of the girls, some as young as 12 were sexually abused, and of course, those who returned were destined to live the life their mothers led.
Eventually, Sattya's friend, Zana Briski, founded the organization Kids with Cameras. She had a big exhibit in NYC and was able to raise $100,000 for scholarships for some of the children to study abroad. About 6 of the 10 children are now studying photography in an art school in NY. The ones who remained in India are also in school.

This is one blurb taken from the Kids with Cameras website:

"In Calcutta's red light district, over 7,000 women and girls work as prostitutes. Only one group has a lower standing: their children. Zana Briski became involved in the lives of these children in 1998 when she first began photographing prostitutes in Calcutta. Living in the brothels for months at a time, she quickly developed a relationship with many of the kids who, often terrorized and abused, were drawn to the rare human companionship she offered.

Fascinated by her camera, Zana thought it would be great to see the world through their eyes. It was at that moment that she had the idea of teaching photography to the children of prostitutes.

To do so would involve overcoming nearly insurmountable obstacles – brothel owners, pimps, police, local politicians, and organized crime syndicate.

Zana held weekly photography workshops between 2000 and 2003. There the children learned camera basics, lighting, composition, the development of point-of-view, editing, and sequencing for narrative. To Zana's delight, equipped with inexpensive point-and-shoot 35mm cameras, the children produced incredible work. Their images are explosions of color: self-portraits, family pictures, street scenes, stunning tableaus of Bengali life."

Zana's film, Born into Brothels , a depiction of her work with the children won the Oscar for best documentary last year.

Getting back to Sattya - the day after I met her, we drove up to the beautiful Deer Park Buddhist Monestary, nestled in the remote hills of Escondido. There we had the privilege of listening to the world renown Buddhist monk, Thich Nhat Hanh.

Although we got there a bit late, I got what I needed. This is what I got:

A life of consumption can only lead to emptiness - compassion and helping others is the way to peace.
This is it. This is all we've got: the here and now. The past is gone, it no longer exists and the future is yet to be. Liberation, awakening, peace, joy, and happiness can only be found in the present moment.

I spent the next three days with Sattya. We went to the beach (smoked cigarettes!) talked about life and death and spiritual lessons. I shared with her things I never even had the guts to share with anyone before, not even my therapists. (Yes, plural!).
Of course, we are still mere mortals and went shopping one morning! I got a new hand bag (well, the strap on my last one broke) and a beautiful turquoise Indian skirt. Girls will be girls. She gave me great tips on shampoo and is insisting on taking me to a salon to get a new haircut! God can be practical too, you know!
She has made me realize that the real treasures on this earth are my family and friends. I am a very lucky soul.

I'm goofy and lazy

Yup. This is me in a nutshell.
I am sooooooooooo not a morning person. I am terribly rock and roll. I could stay up until 4 every night and sleep until noon. Yeah - that's a good schedule.
This is how lazy I am. I have to be at work at 8 a.m. To me, this is EARLY. So, I choose to sleep until 7ish, make my coffee, jump in the shower (for 5-7 minutes), jump out, towel dry my hair, throw my clothes on, wolf down a bowl of cereal, grab a Lean Cuisine from the freezer, get my coffee (which is brewed in a travel mug), jump in the car, crank the heat (to "11"), roll down the window...and "blow dry" my hair.
That's my morning routine. It works for me! (I go to work sans make-up, every now and then when no one is looking I pinch my cheeks. Instant blush. I rarely break out).

This is goofy Sue: I went to see one of my FAVE performers Martha Wainwright the other night. All by my lonesome...poor moi. People here in suburbia have NO clue about music. Why do I live here? Oh yeah - to raise my daughter in a semi-rural, so-called "normal" environment. Whatever. Anyway, before going I put the word out on the Rufus Wainwright Message Board..."anyone here going? Please? I have no cool friends (they live far far away...)". Poor poor pitiful me. I got one response. "Do you live in East County?" he asked when I told him most of my friends are single mothers with baby sitting issues. As a matter of fact, my "coolest" friend is indeed a single parent living in East County! How perceptive of him. (We brought our kids to see Green Day last Sunday. One of the best shows I've ever been to, btw).
Anyway, this guy on the RWMB said, "I'm going with my boyfriend - just look for the two gorgeous bitches up front."
So - I went. Got my diet coke...scanned the room - ooh- cool - I saw two nice looking guys near the front. So I waltz over, and say, "Hi! Are you Chris?" to one of them. He looks at me and says, "No! Who is Chris?" I then explain. He LAUGHS - and tells his partner that I was looking for 2 gorgeous bitches. Then I ask them, "well are you gay?" And the guy who I thought might be Chris says, "oh yeah -we're gay!" Phew - I say to myself. Well, at least my gaydar is accurate! They got such a charge out of me, I have to say! If you know me, you'll understand! I am either pretty reserved, or thoroughly over the top, I swear. So, I chattted with them a bit - one of them (who looked like a very handsome professor) told me how Rufus tried to hit on him at a Barnes and Noble signing in Phillie. His partner told me how he felt very insecure when Rufus was around. Yeah, no doubt!
After the show I chatted with 2 other Rufians - we always bump into eachother in San Diego, one is named Suzy, I am so rude I forgot to ask her friend's name. She took a picture of Martha and me, which was sweet.
Martha was wonderful- as always -I was right up front, she caught me singing along and smiled at me. Then later, when I had her sign a cd (for Rachel Fuller!) she said, "I remember you!!" We chatted for a bit, she's so sweet and just a regular gal.
I told her I was over my Rufus obsession and she laughed. I listen to Martha alot more now...

By the Sea and Sand

Lighter fare here!
I thought I'd share some pictures of a weekend trip we took a few weeks back to San Quintin, Mexico. San Quintin is a beautiful fishing village located 200 miles south of Tijuana. It took us 6 hours to get there! Thank God I have travelled quite a bit through the villages of India...driving through this part of Mexico was like a Sunday drive on the Autobahn. It was time in my new Forester(I know, how suburban can you get...my Volvo finally died) well spent. When we got there, we pretty much had the beach to ourselves, as you can see! We could see nothing but sea and sand for miles and miles and miles...how's that for a mixed Whoism??

More Pictures and the Speech That Says It All

I just received an e-mail of a transcipt of the most moving speech at the rally.
Here's the e-mail:

you know, i took charles barkley at his word during the 1990s when he said "I am not your role model". i do not look to commercial/professional sports for spiritual metaphors or inspiration; it is part of the entertainment industry, and despite it being the only avenue to survival for so many people of color, that avenue is generally not packaged with real power to change the system. any more than hollywood celebrities are necessarily politically astute, unless they are making deliberate, risk-taking choices with their art that consistently reflects their beliefs.

but, there are exceptions. great minds break through. and at last week's anti-war event in d.c., the nba's etan thomas stood up and made the speech below. share it, hear it, let it be what he intended it to be. bless him, bless you all.

“Giving all honor, thanks and praises to God for courage and wisdom, this is a very important rally. I'd like to thank you for allowing me to share my thoughts, feelings and concerns regarding a tremendous problem that we are currently facing. This problem is universal, transcending race, economic background, religion, and culture, and this problem is none other than the current administration which has set up shop in the White House.

In fact, I'd like to take some of these cats on a field trip. I want to get big yellow buses with no air conditioner and no seatbelts and round up Bill O'Reilly, Pat Buchanan, Trent Lott, Sean Hannity, Dick Cheney, Jeb Bush, Bush Jr. and Bush Sr., John Ashcroft, Giuliani, Ed Gillespie, Katherine Harris, that little bow-tied Tucker Carlson and any other right-wing conservative Republicans I can think of, and take them all on a trip to the ‘hood. Not to do no 30-minute documentary. I mean, I want to drop them off and leave them there, let them become one with the other side of the tracks, get them four mouths to feed and no welfare, have scare tactics run through them like a laxative, criticizing them for needing assistance.

I’d show them working families that make too much to receive welfare but not enough to make ends meet. I’d employ them with jobs with little security, let them know how it feels to be an employee at will, able to be fired at the drop of a hat. I’d take away their opportunities, then try their children as adults, sending their 13-year-old babies to life in prison. I’d sell them dreams of hopelessness while spoon-feeding their young with a daily dose of inferior education. I’d tell them no child shall be left behind, then take more money out of their schools, tell them to show and prove themselves on standardized exams testing their knowledge on things that they haven’t been taught, and then I’d call them inferior.

I’d soak into their interior notions of endless possibilities. I’d paint pictures of assisted productivity if they only agreed to be all they can be, dress them up with fatigues and boots with promises of pots of gold at the end of rainbows, free education to waste terrain on those who finish their bid. Then I’d close the lid on that barrel of fool’s gold by starting a war, sending their children into the midst of a hostile situation, and while they're worried about their babies being murdered and slain in foreign lands, I’d grace them with the pain of being sick and unable to get medicine.

Give them health benefits that barely cover the common cold. John Q. would become their reality as HMOs introduce them to the world of inferior care, filling their lungs with inadequate air, penny pinching at the expense of patients, doctors practicing medicine in an intricate web of rationing and regulations. Patients wander the maze of managed bureaucracy, costs rise and quality quickly deteriorates, but they say that managed care is cheaper. They’ll say that free choice in medicine will defeat the overall productivity, and as co-payments are steadily rising, I'll make their grandparents have to choose between buying their medicine and paying their rent.

Then I'd feed them hypocritical lines of being pro-life as the only Christian way to be. Then very contradictingly, I’d fight for the spread of the death penalty, as if thou shall not kill applies to babies but not to criminals.

Then I’d introduce them to those sworn to protect and serve, creating a curb in their trust in the law. I’d show them the nightsticks and plungers, the pepper spray and stun guns, the mace and magnums that they’d soon become acquainted with, the shakedowns and illegal search and seizures, the planted evidence, being stopped for no reason. Harassment ain’t even the half of it. Forty-one shots to two raised hands, cell phones and wallets that are confused with illegal contrabands. I’d introduce them to pigs who love making their guns click like wine glasses. Everlasting targets surrounded by bullets, making them a walking bull's eye, a living piñata, held at the mercy of police brutality, and then we’ll see if they finally weren’t aware of the truth, if their eyes weren’t finally open like a box of Pandora.

I’d show them how the other side of the tracks carries the weight of the world on our shoulders and how society seems to be holding us down with the force of a boulder. The bird of democracy flew the coop back in Florida. See, for some, and justice comes in packs like wolves in sheep's clothing. T.K.O.'d by the right hooks of life, many are left staggering under the weight of the day, leaning against the ropes of hope. When your dreams have fallen on barren ground, it becomes difficult to keep pushing yourself forward like a train, administering pain like a doctor with a needle, their sequels continue more lethal than injections.


They keep telling us all is equal. I’d tell them that instead of giving tax breaks to the rich, financing corporate mergers and leading us into unnecessary wars and under-table dealings with Enron and Halliburton, maybe they can work on making society more peaceful. Instead, they take more and more money out of inner city schools, give up on the idea of rehabilitation and build more prisons for poor people. With unemployment continuing to rise like a deficit, it's no wonder why so many think that crime pays.

Maybe this trip will make them see the error of their ways. Or maybe next time, we'll just all get out and vote. And as far as their stay in the White House, tell them that numbered are their days.”

D.C. March and Protest 9/24-26/05

Ok! I finally figured out how to post pictures here. That's me in the blue "Peace Monger" shirt with my daughter and husband.
We spent 5 days in the DC area - and we spent 4 whole days in DC and I still only got to see a smidge.
It was a very moving trip - from the sightseeing to the rally/march and protest at the White House.
We saw the Lincoln Memorial - really beautiful (and huge), the Viet Nam Memorial (I told my little girl that each name represented a soldier who died, and her reply was: "I wish there weren't so many names"), the WWII Memorial (I need to go back and spend more time there -it's incredible), the Washington Monument and the Capitol. It was SOOOOO hot that day!
I have to say, although I am for the most part a pacifist, of course, I still believe that we must resort to war sometimes. WWII was justified...I think that goes without saying.
The rally/march on Saturday was fantastic. There were 150,000 people in attendance. As you may have read, it was the largest demonstration since the start of the war.

The march took much longer than expected, so we missed Joan Baez. Oh well - she'll be at the next one, I'm sure!
Cindy Sheehan spoke at the rally before the march. Although she only spoke briefly, she just hit everything dead on and she really energized the crowd.
I was so glad that it was a peaceful march - there were only 3 arrests for minor offenses. My little 7 year old marched along w/ us - her godfather and his wife joined us. She said afterward that her feet hurt - not from walking but from getting stepped on! Poor babe.
I also protested at the White House on Monday. I was right next to the fence, but then heeded the warnings about arrests (aw)and got right behind the barricade - I wasn't sure how long I'd be held, and we were to fly at 5:30. NEXT TIME I'll make better plans and stay longer!
I was there for about 3 hours. I lost my voice, but it felt so good. People from all walks of life - black, white, old, young, straight, gay, clergymen, Buddhist monks, and MOST importantly, Iraqi vets.
I spoke to a very cute young soldier who served there when the war began. I asked him if other soldiers felt the way he did - he said "oh yes, definately, but we don't have the luxury of free speech in the service, so you could end up in deep shit and lose the benefits we nearly die for." I asked him about morale, and he said it's VERY VERY LOW. The soldiers live in constant fear, it's very dangerous, they're worrying about their families, their families worry about them. They know that once they go home, chances are they'll be deployed again...it's very hard.
I also met a mother from Scotland who lost a son, she founded an organization (I have to look again at my picture) but it's something like "military families against the war."
I felt so good flying home, I don't feel so alone anymore - because most people around me honestly do not have any feelings one way or another about this war. To see that others are as outraged and vocal about their feelings, really gave me a sense of hope. I've repressed so much anger about Bush, and it was starting to drain the life out of me.
We need to use our voice - that's what democracy is all about.

All we are saying...

"Naturally, the common people don't want war, but after all, it is the leaders of a country who determine the policy, and it is always a simple matter to drag people along whether it is a democracy, or a facist dictatorship, or a parliament or a communist dictatorship. Voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of the leaders. This is easy. All you have to do is tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same in every country." ~ Hermann Goering, Hitler's Reich-Marshall at the Nuremberg Trials after WWII


Well, I'm gearing up for my first trip to Washington, D.C. It's sure to be a trip I'll always remember, for not only is it my first time visiting our fine Capitol, it will be the first anti-war rally I've ever attended.
Cindy Sheehan really snapped me out of my complacency regarding this illegal, immoral slaughter that is occuring in the name of "freedom." Mothers will save the world. It's our nature to preserve and protect life.
I've been deeply depressed since we first attacked Iraq, but haven't done a damn thing to voice my opinion about it, which is a crime really. So now I'll be able to rest a little easier, and hopefully this have some kind of impact.
The events are taking place over three days, starting with an "Operation Ceasefire" Concert/Rally on September 24th at the Washington Monument and it will go on for about 11 hours. I'm only familiar with a few of the bands/artists on the bill, but I am THRILLED to see that Joan Baez was recently added. Also appearing are Thievery Corporation (they actually organized the event -they're kewl), Steve Earle (I like him), Sweet Honey in the Rock (I saw them at a Newport Folk Festival - they're wonderful) and many others (whom I've never heard of!). Jello Biafra will host, so that will be interesting.
On Sunday I'll be sightseeing (well I have to be a tourist for a day, right?).
On Monday, the 26th I'll participate in a mass civil-resistance demonstration at the White House and there's a chance I may get arrested (although it's only a slight one). I'm ready to walk the walk! (My husband, Sujoy and our 7 year old daughter, Anjoli will not be attending though - so it will be a little weird. That's ok).
Wish me luck!
If you are interested in attending, check out unitedforpeace.org...
Please come - we need lots and lots of warm bodies! If you do come, just look for a chick in a blue "Peace Monger" t-shirt! :)
Peace and love to all...
Sue

My Green Nose

I'm reading Augusten Burrough's Dry and I love it. I'm nearly done and I don't want it to end. Augusten and Anne Lamott make me want to write a pithy, self-deprecating memoir. Maybe blogging is a start.
Anyway, Dry has inspired me to really get sober, once and for all. I'm not out of control anymore, thank GOD (literally) but it's time to get healthy and really start LIVING.
Today, after getting out of work earlier than anticipated (like 2 hours!) I thought I'd "treat" myself and go hang out at this great organic, vegan, raw food restaurant here in Chula Vista called Cilantro.
So, I ordered a "double shot" of wheatgrass (lawn clippings as my not-so-granola friend Mary calls it) along with a 16 ounce glass of carrot juice. Ooh baby - when I make up my mind to get healthy, I just don't hold back! I felt so good, passing up my usual Starbucks Caramel Macchiato for a cocktail of enzymes, chlorophyll and vitamins. They even served the wheatgrass in a shot glass, no less. Fancy.
So, I read for a while, savoring the betacarotene beverage. I took my time.
When I left the restaurant, I honestly felt more energetic; my walk had a bounce to it.
I got to my car, picked up my daughter at school, chatted briefly with friends and teachers, and we drove home.
I'm feeling good about conquering demons, happy with my new job assignment - teaching 8 special needs kids, la dee dah. Then, I look in the mirror to assess the state of my mop top from hell (I am so sick of my hair) and I notice there's a HUGE smudge of green on my nose - it looked like someone took a paint brush across the tip of my nose! I was horrified. WHY DIDN'T ANYONE TELL ME I HAD DRIED WHEATGRASS ON MY NOSE????
Ah, just one of the perils of living in soCal, I guess.

Ants Make Me Feel Small

So one of the perks of living in paradise a.k.a. San Diego is having to play hostess to a deluge of ants. arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgh.
They have invaded my kitchen and they will not stop.
It's not a cleanliness thing either. My counter is spotless (well now it is) because I am constantly spraying the little buggers with a non-toxic lavender cleaning fluid. They die on the spot.
I googled non-toxic solutions to ant infestation, and saw a few good tips. Apparently the most effective natural deterrent is the bay leaf. So now my counters are strewn w/ bay leaves, but those clever insects are now crawling in droves just beneath the counter.
I suppose it could be worse - cockroaches maybe, but still, I looked in the mirror last night and there was a dead ant on one of my eyelids! Pretty!
So the moral is - we can video conference with our spouses while they are away on business trips (and have them do a little dance in the nude for you!), we can shop for groceries on line and have them delivered to your doorstep within minutes (although I am not THAT lazy...yet), and of course let's not forget to mention the proverbial rocket ship to the moon, yes we have all these wonders of science in our midst, YET, these ants have me on my kneees!!!!!!!!! I am begging them to just LEAVE ME ALONE!!!

But, really, who am I to whine? As I sit at my desk, squishing yet another little black nuisance, I think of the poor souls in New Orleans who wish they HAD A HOME to give shelter to these pests.

Yes, it's true: nature will always show us who is boss.
She's truly humbling. Not always nice, but always humbling.

The I and thou

I am always
Without I.

So where is the one
Who acts or enjoys?

And what is the rising
Or the vanishing of thought?

What is the invisible world,
Or the visible?

In my heart I am one.

What is this world?

Who seeks freedom,
Or wisdom or oneness?

Who bound or free?

-Ashtavakra Gita 20:5-6
From "The Heart of Awareness: A Translation of the Ashtavakra Gita," by Thomas Byrom, 1990

We are all made of stars (even if we smell badly)

Yesterday, on the train back from L.A. , I sat in front of a homeless person. He must have bucks though - because it's a $30 fare each way. Anyway, man did he smell. ooh eee. I thought about moving, but I was feeling lazy.
After an hour or so, I used the restroom. When I returned, I noticed the smelly filthy man was sitting in the seat next to mine. hmmm. At that point, I really considered moving, but, I thought, well, that's not very nice, Ms. Compassionate world peace love thy neighbor girl, is it?
So, I stayed put.
The stench was SO bad, it made my eyes sting.
Then I remembered the bad old days, when I was a total pothead, very much a slut even, and I had no apartment. I considered myself a "boho" (I did have a job though - not much of one...). If not for the grace of God, who led me to a friend who "took me in" and later, my aunt who took care of me (I got SO sick - I had pneumonia, mono and an inflamed liver) when I couldn't care for myself...well, who knows what could have happened. I was as close as I ever was to death. It was a scary time for me, I hit the bottom.
A few minutes after I made the decision to stay, this family came and sat diagonally to me. I spotted the cutest little boy in a blue baseball cap - he looked to be 5 or 6. He was clutching a Teddy Bear - clad in a little khaki safari outfit and sunglasses with a Teddy Bear sized backback on his furry little back.
The little boy sat him on the table in front of him, but faced the bear toward the window. He leaned his head against the window, and together, the boy and his Teddy enjoyed the view of the sea...
If I had moved my seat, I never would have been able to savor this beautiful, innocent moment.
All of us "contain multitudes" and contradictions, as Walt Whitman said in "Song of Myself." Bum, innocent,slut, saint. That's me.
(By the way, one of the conductors came by about 20 minutes later, spotted the smelly man, and asked him to move a few rows back...).

My first blog entry!

Well, thanks to Rachel Fuller, I've decided to blog! Cool. Thanks for the inspiration Rachel!

I've named by blog Suesjoy for a couple of reasons, but mainly because my name is Sue (Susan) and my husband's name is Sujoy. I had a friend in Boston (where are you Evan?) who used to call my husband, "Sue's Joy!" Get it? Our friends in Texas called us "the Sues" no one has referred to us that way since. Aw...kinda sad. Those were good times...too good! Anyway, I am digressing here. But I can do that. It's MY blog, damnit!

I'll be lazy though, and copy something I wrote on the Rufus Wainwright board.
To know me, is to know (or at least know of) RUFUS!!!
I went to the CBS Studio in LA to see a taping of the Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson...because...u no who was the musical guest.

I am REALLY tired, but I will share my experience, since it was so awesome.I took the train from San Diego to LA. yesterday. I got to LA at one, walked around Olvera Street, found a cool Frida Khalo bookmark and inspirational "Jesus card" one of those plastic cards you stick in your wallet when you need some spiritual guidance, and had 2 AWESOME chicken tacos. Yum yum. Then I took a cab and got to the CBS studio VERY early -at 2 pm. The ticket guy said to come back around 4...so I walked around a bit, had some coffee...then when I came back around 3:20 there was already a line of about 25 or so...when I was waiting I saw someone who looked like Dave Foley pull in through the gate in a BMW convertible...he was checking out the line...I was hoping he was a guest on the show - and sure enough he did make a (very funny) appearance.Saw Carina, then Nancy (she's Galadriel on the RWMB - I think) and Anne (Cinnamaroll). I was happy to see familiar faces, since I was all by my lonesome...so we chatted and discussed our dorkiness (as we always do). I was especially embarrassed when I had to unwrap an empty Starbucks cup for security! "NO, it's not a bomb, but Rufus' quote is da bomb!" The lady didn't think it was strange (well it was L.A... ). So, before we go in, we are prepped on how to behave by a few staff members, including a funny guy - he's a comedian - he was the warm-up dude and he was really great. I was beyond excited by that point.Finally, we get the cattle call and we all walk upstairs to the studio in single file. They were showing musical guests on the tv screens for our entertainment, then the comedian did his thing for a bit - we learn that there is a "babe section" - yes they single out the "best looking" women and corral them into the front bench on the left side of the audience. No, I wasn't chosen. I'm still wounded, but I'll get over it eventually... More fun - the warm-up guy (Roger?) gets to know the audience - he had prizes for the most exhuberent audience members. (Nancy got a Want 2 cd!). When he asked who wasn't from Hollywood I raised my hand and did a swan dive for a t-shirt which he threw in my direction - then I had to wrestle it out of the hands of this older lady sitting next to me (well I was closer!). He felt bad for her and gave her one a minute later! I almost got in trouble (what else is new?) because at one point the audience director came over to me and told me to "refrain from talking" - that he picked it up on the mics overhead - I didn't remember talking - the lady next to me made a comment about something Roger said - and I said, "what?" because I'm pretty deaf. ANYHOO...Before Craig came out they told us that they tape the musical guest first - so he introduced Rufus and when he walked out the crowd went BALLISTIC!!!!!!! These cute boys - they were from Australia and Florida were chanting "Roooooooofus Rooooooooooooofus Roooooooooofus!" Rufus looked at them with a (mocked) horrific look - I bet he loved it - and Roger was like, "Ok - that's MUCH more that we ever could ask for!" and Rufus nodded his head in agreement.I was ELATED when he started This Love Affair - I agree w/ his mom(folk singer/songwriter Kate McGarrigle) - it's my fave. He was perfect and SO professional - just took a deep breath before they started taping to focus and bam - it was a flawless performance, really truly.When it was over, he just waved goodbye...and that was it! I was so sad when they packed up his piano...no! Come back!Roger said they kept us outside too long - I think he would have performed one more, just for the audience. Craig came out and he was really funny, and much better looking in person. He said he was born in '62 when he did his James Bond bit...so he's the same age as me. (But I look WAY younger ). Dave Foley was a riot - that was a great surprise - loved the P. Diddy thing ("Itty Bitty Booklight Diddy") - too funny.At one point in the show they taped Craig introducing Rufus (so we could cheer - Rufus was already long gone) - so we stood up and went insane again. Then we sat down and Craig said "he's not coming back!" Wah! It's kind of weird how they do things on t.v.I looked around for Carina - but she got to the line late, so she didn't get in. Sorry Carina. We missed you!As we were walking out, one of the board members, who shall remain nameless, spotted a script in the trash bin and, being the sly one that she is, pulled it out and stuck it in her purse (for Rufus to sign one day!).After the show, we met up with Chancellor (my friend Laura) and had a 2 1/2 hour dinner. The 4 of us just laughed and laughed and shared all our Rufus moments/gossip. We were so giddy it was too much. We decided we need to start a "Ruf-Anon" for the spouses, partners and loved ones who are close to those who are addicted to Rufus. We talked so long I missed my train home, which was fine with me.( We didn't just talk about Rufus, btw, we actually do have lives! ). I stayed over at Chancellor's and we had hot chocolate and watched the show! I even spotted myself standing/clapping for Carl Reiner - I'm on the left side in a sea green top. I look like I have a blue afro! Kinda scary. I suppose one day, when I'm old, I will have a blue beehive, Rhinestone cat eye glasses and support hose to help me chase Rufus as he exits from the stage door..."Come back, Rufus!" I'll scream, " come back!"